30 September 2004

Loren, East Grinstead and trolley buses

Lessons learned from today's show
  • Dearly Beloved (aka Adrian) has never heard of Ava Gardner or 'trolley buses'.
  • SK is off to hometown East Grinstead after accepting an offer to visit a medical charity there.

    Loren -- lovely

    Lessons learned from yesterday's show
  • Sarah thinks that Sophia Loren is the most beautiful person on the planet.
  • SK also thinks that every relationship should have a few issues on which both partners disagree. For instance, Sarah firmly believes that the sun only comes out for a few months a year -- Dearly Beloved (aka Adrian), does not.
  • 28 September 2004

    Bossoms, showers and dogs

    Lessons learned from today's show
    Nun's boobies -- v. large
  • At the convent, Sarah's cooking teacher was called Virginia. She had the biggest bust Sarah has ever seen.
  • In Bologna, silly old Dearly Beloved (aka Adrian) pulled the piece of string in the hotel's shower, and a member of staff promptly appeared.
  • SK was convinced that today's Daily Telegraph contained a photograph of her good self. That is, until she realised it was a picture of a dog.
  • 27 September 2004

    Weather and Bologna

    McCaskill -- rubbish at forecastingLessons learned from today's show
  • Sarah finds it very hard to concentrate during weather forecasts.
  • SK and Much Beloved (aka Adrian) had a lovely time in Bologna. They didn't buy a guide book, so ambled around the place looking at churches.
  • Sarah brought back a load of hotel cheeses for Lynn Bowles.
  • 25 September 2004

    Alarm bells and baloney

    Lessons learned from yesterday's show
  • We now know how Sarah missed Thursday's show. In her sleep, she swept her alarm clocks and tablets under the bed, so didn't get woken up!
  • SK is off to Bologna this weekend to celebrate Her Much Beloved's (aka Adrian's) birthday. He is...

    ... 38!
  • 24 September 2004


    Lessons learned from yesterday's show
    Fester -- no substitute for the real thing
  • Sarah's alarm clock failed, so Mr Alex Lester (aka Uncle Fester) did the show (just, not quite as good as Sarah would have done it).

    Sarah's helperLessons learned from Wednesday's show
  • Sarah spent three and a half hours on the phone trying to book an Apex train ticket to Torquay. She still hasn't got the ticket.
  • SK has someone come in and do her ironing.
  • Jonathan Ross -- standing in for Wogan -- said that Sarah kindly showed him photographs of all her cats.
  • 22 September 2004

    Peacocks and jokes

    Lessons learned from yesterday's show
    Peacock -- Woss thought Sarah's offer was a euphemism for something else...
  • Sarah offered Jonathan Ross some of her peacocks (he later politely turned down the gift).
  • Sarah's new joke book will be out next month.
  • 21 September 2004

    Windfalls, Woss and Hector the cat

    Lessons learned from yesterday's show
    Ross -- a new frisson in town?
  • Silly old Dearly Beloved (AKA Adrian) let in some people into Sarah's garden after they asked if they were allowed to come in and pick up the apple windfalls. They were in their late 50s and Sarah was worried in case a bee had stung them, as she could have been sued. Also, Sarah was hoping to use the windfalls herself for some jam.
  • Jonathan Ross -- standing in for Wogan -- smells 'fragrant'.
  • Silly old Hector (SK's cat) is scared of peacocks.
  • 16 September 2004

    Lynn Bowles' microphone

    For the second day running, Sarah forgot to turn on Lynn Bowles' microphone.

    14 September 2004

    Disaster! and Lynn's presents

    Lessons learned from today's show
    Time to brush your teethingtons
  • Sarah had a disastrous morning. She awoke at 5:15, an hour and a half late and didn't have time to brush her teeth. When she got in to the studio there was no music. She then had a massive sneezing fit during the news review
  • Lynn Bowles' holiday presents from SK were some shells and some truffles.
  • 13 September 2004

    Apricot squirrels, holidays and pants

    Lessons learned from today's show
    Sarah's back from Portugal and Dublin!
  • Sarah has seen some red squirrels, but they are actually more the colour of apricots.
  • Whilst in Portugal, SK saw the biggest pair of pants she has ever seen. They were hanging from a clothes line.
  • Much Beloved (aka Adrian) was Bag Carrying Man for the entire holiday. A job he excelled at. He also went off and bought Lynne Bowles a present. Ms K wrapped it up in her vest and will be presenting it to the traffic woman tomorrow.
  • 9 September 2004

    Possible postcard from Portugal

    Sarah's postcard from Portugal
    Greetingtons from sunny Portugal,

    We're having a lovely time here in Portgual and the Portugalese are making us feel right at home. Lovely food and extraordinary cakes to eat.

    The other day I watched a curious tabby cat eat a bowl of cat food.

    SWs to you all!


    PS I've found Lynne Bowles a nice pebble.

    6 September 2004

    Richard Allinson needs reeducating

    Lessons learned from today's show
  • Sarah will need to teach Richard Allinson about the paper review when she returns. In her absence, his lasted about one minute and included an estate agent's publication. What's all that about?
    Allinson -- news buffoon
  • 3 September 2004

    Requesticles, car soiling and holidays

    Lessons learned from today's show
  • Ms Kennedy's special term for 'request' is 'requesticle'.
  • At one time or another, Sarah has spilt fish sauce, eggs and a plam tree in her car (aka Bot).
  • SK is off to Portugal next week -- that nice Mr Richard Allinson will be replacing her.
    Allinson -- big hair, big heart
  • 2 September 2004

    Gas, Laurel and Hardy, and the Marx Brothers

    Lessons learned from today's show
  • Sarah used to love going to the dentist as a child and being gassed. She loved the 'trips' she would go on and hated waking up.
  • Laurel and Hardy, nor the Marx Brothers have ever made Sarah laugh.
    Marx brothers -- not as funny as Much Beloved
  • 1 September 2004

    Trousers and Poirot

    Lessons learned from today's show
    Poirot -- silly moustache, hardly realistic
  • Sarah nearly left the house this morning without any trousers on -- honestly!
  • SK got nice newsreader Fran Godfrey to tape Poirot the other day.